My story - the wedding

It is hard to think where to start, so I will start with my wedding. I think my story begins here, since my feelings were severely changed after May 3.
I had my absolute dream wedding on April 18, 2009. We celebrated for three days, beautiful weather, all dear friends and family with us, it was wonderful. On the evening before the wedding we had a big party during which my brothers and sisters performed a splendid play depicting my husband Luke and myself in 30 years with children and all. It was so funny! I laughed and had tears streaming down my face. What a wonderful gift! The service at church was also amazing: I had all my five brothers and sisters around me, and all of them were involved in the ceremony. My younger sisters were my bridesmaids, one of my brothers helped with the procession and said a special prayer, the other one was a groomsman and Alexander, who was a singer, sang with my aunt a piece by Bach and Amazing Grace. It was beautiful! With this all of them helped so much to make our wedding special.
After a big breakfast with our guests we drove back to my parents' house the morning after. In the evening we opened our presents with our immediate family. After that my husband's family had to go to the airport to fly home. My husband's cousin and her husband, however, stayed for a few more days to spend with us. Alexander kept the list with all the presents and generous givers. Those were the last few hours I spent with my brother. However, he was there, but he was also absent. It is hard to describe, but even though he was present, event talked with us about the exact name of the giver, his attitude was such that I quickly forgot that he was there. It was so often during his last few weeks that he was asleep for most of the day or that he was not really involved in whatever was going on that we almost did not expect him to be there. And yet he was and helped us along, in fact is still helping us (we are still writing thank-yous...). I do not remember whether he was there and ate dinner with us that evening. Both Luke and me were really exhausted from a week of few hours of sleep, so we went to bed early that night and slept in. The next day we were touring in the area of my parents place with our two remaining guests and had dinner again at my parents'. Again, I do not remember Alexander being there, although I am fairly sure that he was. We were all happy and still full of the amazing, glowing feeling that was still surrounding us after the wedding. I was living a dream, finally being married to the love of my life. Later, after dinner that night I remember going out in the hallway, where Alexander was headed towards his room. He looked sad. So I asked him whether everything was alright, and he answered "no". So I asked again: "So what is wrong?" His reply: "Simply everything". I hugged him, wanting to ask a bit more. Just that moment our mum came in the hall and through my hug I felt him stiffen up - he did not want her to be there that moment. After my mum had left again it was not the same atmosphere between us anymore, and I did not feel like working hard to restore this feeling since I had guests in the living room. You always have a brother, and even if he is not feeling well, I can listen to him later, right? And truth be told, I knew already his story of what was wrong. It was always the same story and I had heard and listened to it many times. So I headed for the living room while Alexander went to bed. It was the last time I saw him alive.
The next morning we were in a rush to leave for our next stop on our 'honeymoon', my aunt's place. However, we still packed all our gifts (which took a while), so I am pretty sure we did not leave before noon, more like at 1pm. Alexander was still not awake and we were in a rush to finally leave and see at least something of the mountains that day. So I just told my other brother to say goodbye to Alexander, I did not go in his room again. I wish I had said at least a proper goodbye.
We continued with our honeymoon, said goodbye to our guests, had some time by ourselves and finally got back home.